Hype Live! School hypebeast project
by dempheelsdoe
Summary: AU. The members of Muse are highly influenced by the western "hypebeast" culture. Many references that may not be understood ahead. M for language and inappropriate jokes. Large WIP, CRACK
1. Chapter 1

**Yo! Nice to meet you guys. My name is Phil, and this is my first fic on this site. This is still a work in progress, so please, tell me what you think! Reviews are always appreciated!**

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As Kousaka Honoka dreams away after last night's binge watching of the Air Jordan reviews and the Yeezy Season 2 fashion show, Honoka finds herself in quite the predicament.

The mind of Kousaka Honoka is an enigma, with her dreams running as quickly as semen outside of a vagina after a really badly performed pullout. Her mind was influenced, "tainted" if you will, by the oddball culture of western "hypebeasts" she had found just 2 months ago. Long gone were the days of browsing _Shounen Jump_ and _Dengeki G_ magazines as Honoka would start browsing sites like _Complex Style_ and _Hypebeast_ , among sneaker-dedicated sites such as _Kicks on Fire_ or _Sole Collector_. This was proven by her, um, _unique_ dreams that a normal schoolgirl of Japan would not be proud of having.

In tonight's dream, Honoka hears the doorbell ring in a mainstream-sounding tone.

"Hello?" she asks, opening the door. There was a package lain on the doorstep with stickers and marks denoting its pass through international customs. She brought it into her home, not being able to fathom its contents. As Honoka laid the surprisingly light box onto the table, something in her mind clicked. Very loudly.

"Maybe," she says to herself, "maybe I finally won a raffle!" Honoka then looked to the delivery information slapped on the side of the box.

"Sent from America," the label read in _katakana_ , making Honoka slightly wet as she unfolded the phrase.

"No way!" Honoka exclaims, releasing an orgasmic voice at the thought. She then ripped open the poor box with the force of a thousand suns, revealing not a familiar grey shoe box containing the coveted pair of Adidas Yeezy Boost 750's, but a single letter placed on a pile of packing peanuts. A letter, with Kanye West's own signature. That, and words that formed the phrase "YOU AIN'T GOT NO YEEZY'S NIGGA".

Honoka woke up from the nightmare to the earth-shattering, orgasm-inducing shriek that was her smartphone alarm.

"FUCKIN' KANYE DAMNIT!" the hypebeast roared as she awoke. From her room, the littlest Kousaka, Yukiho, yells back, "STOP WORSHIPPING THAT PIECE OF TRASH!"

"YEEZUS IS NOT TRASH YUKIHO, HE IS LORD." Honoka yells back to her imouto-chan.

"Honoka! Yukiho! Keep it down!" Their mother stopped the dispute, which was amazing, since it the clock currently read 5:47. In the morning.

Honoka grudgingly got out of bed, and prepared herself some toast. No butter, no jam, just precisely toast. After that, she had herself an enlightening shower, adding some Japanese soul to Jay-Z's "Otis". Honoka quickly slipped out of the shower and into her favorite Givenchy Rottweiler collar tee, a black BAPE shark head hoodie, khaki joggers, and a coveted pair of tan camo Supreme Jordan 5's. She tied up her hair into her signature side pigtail thing and swaggered out of her home. She was the greeted by her two childhood friends, Umi Sonoda and Kotori Minami.

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 **I know that this doesn't seem like much so far, but I promise you that there will be more to come. Stay tuned for more!** **-Phil**


	2. Chapter 2

**So, what'd you think about the first chapter? It was fun to write it, and I'm sure it'll be interesting to write more. Please enjoy this one as well!**

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"Mornin', you two," Honoka greeted with the most medial amount of genki. "How was last night's fuckin' for ya?"

"Absolutely amazing," Kotori said as she immersed herself in recent memory. It was as if she wanted someone to ask that question. It was unknown how Honoka retrieved this information, but it didn't cross either of their minds at the time.

"Kotori would not let me sleep," Umi replied in an annoyed tone. "Bitch almost got my Air Force 1's dirty!" she exclaimed, as if with no remorse. Umi, being the unlucky person that she is, always takes an L at one point or another and it seems like she gets her period two times the regular amount.

"Girl, the triple whites? Fuck, man." Honoka looked to Kotori, who seemed to be drooling while looking at the baby blue sky littered with hints of pink and orange, signifying the newly-risen sun.

"Oi, Kotoburb," Honoka snapped quickly, "You better get to your senses or your Gamma Blue's will be covered in slobber."

"H-huh? What? Oh yeah, can't forget that I haven't sprayed these with a protector yet. Damn, it's getting hard to keep track." Kotori came (haha, came) back quickly, and bent down to wipe the patent leather on her now-undeadstock Air Jordan 11's. Umi followed suit, dusting off the toe box of her OG Reebok Pumps, made famous by America's own Shaquille O'Neal. She then pumped up the rubber basketball on the tongue for that little bit of plush comfort at the ankle.

Honoka had dragged along the rest of Muse into the blackhole of hypebeast ways. Over the past two weeks, everyone in the idol group looked like they were endorsers of high fashion brands such as Haider Ackermann and Pyrex Vision (note: not the kitchenware brand). After having cleaned off their kicks, Umi and Kotori's outfits were then noted by Honoka.

Kotori was laced up in her previously mentioned Gamma Blue 11's with pinrolled True Religion jeans and a Supreme box logo tee. Sporting a bulkier, more old-school look, Umi paired some grey sweats with her white Reebok Pumps, and a black sleeveless down jacket with a blue t-shirt of an indiscernible brand which topped off her look. The trio started walking to their school, schoolbags slung on their shoulders. Umi then pipes up to rid of the silence.

"Ever since I got these Pumps, I thought I felt powerful", she started, "but now I pale in comparison to your Supreme 5's, Honoka."

"Oh definitely," Honoka replied back. "I just hate these kids screaming 'what are those' while they themselves are wearing some KD's or Lebron's. It's ridiculous," she vents.

"In any case, I sure wouldn't mind getting my own pair of Pumps. Them shits seem mad comfortable," Kotori adds, complimenting Umi's choice in shoes today. The trio started to near Otonokizaka Academy, a school known for their uniforms. Muse is an exception, with Kotori able to persuade her mom into allowing the idol group to flaunt and exhibit their westernized style. Of course, there would be some sort of compensation for the "slight inconvenience".

"Holy shit guys," Honoka says shakily, looking down at her phone.

"Triple Black Yeezy 750's are coming on the 19th," she announces.

"By Yeezus, they're real!" Kotori exclaims, hugging Umi tightly. "It's the Second Coming!"

"Nozomi might get ahold of 'em, with her spiritual power and such. Might burn down the whole school with that much fire, though," Umi squeezes out from her lungs.

"We've gotta go tell the others as soon as school is over," Honoka tells the two.

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 **I really liked how this chapter turned out. I figured out that this story won't be too long, and that it'll just be small little chapters like this. To those who read, I thank you for your time. Remember, new reviews are always appreciated! -Phil**


	3. Chapter 3

**Looks like we're at the third chapter now. Let's get slammin' like Michael Jordan in Space Jam!**

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As the school day came to an end, all of Muse had congregated in the idol-laden clubroom, with posters of Ronnie Fieg and Kanye West plastered next to the ones of A-RISE and the like. Passing the clubroom and peeking through the window was always a sight to see to the other students, what with their unique clothes and mannerisms and such.

Honoka, Umi, and Kotori each waited for the others to arrive. First was Nico, the little devil. Her hair was strewn up in her signature pigtails, but with a distinct font of letters on the edges of her red hairties. The letters "S," "M," and "E" could be seen just peeking out; presumably some custome Supreme hair ties. Hypebeasts would buy anything would Supreme written on it after all; have you seen their fire extinguishers? Anyway, her short stature was covered by grey Nikelab Tech Fleece, hoodie, pants and all. Her sneakers were a distinct camo tone, being a pair of BAPE Puma Disc Blazes.

'What's happenin?" Nico says as she sits down in front of the room window. Maki follows suit, the tsundere clad with a Supreme box logo crewneck and some maroon joggers accompanied by the recent "Maroon" Jordan 6 Retro hugging her feet.

"Are the others coming?" Umi asks.

"Yep, Hanayo and Rin should be here any minute," replies Maki.

"I'm pretty sure Nozomi and Eli are fucking around again; probably kissing in a stall. I can only hope that they don't get their 'fits messed up," says Nico.

The doors opens, revealing RinPana in clothing you'd least expect them in. Rin follows Umi's theme of "old-school cool," sporting a pair of the bulky Ewing 33 Hi in white with some navy blue basketball shorts and a New York Knicks jersey with a "33" on its back, foreshadowing their events overseas. Hanayo seemed to sport a more nomadic sort of style, wearing a pair of desert-colored Visvim FBT Elks and jeans from Kanye's own A.P.C. collaboration. Like Honoka, she also wore a BAPE sharkhead hoodie on her back, being a grey color.

"Hiya anatatachi, we finna be on some good shit today?" Rin yelled with enough genki to equal the power each of the world's nuclear warheads.

"Afternoon girls, we doing anything special? Camping out? Any conventions announced?" Hanayo greets the group as she and Rin sit next to Maki.

"Well," Umi said to the group, "we just have to wait for _the_ two massive lesbians to come through. Then we'll be able to talk."

They passed the moments by looking through the usual sneaker blogs, Foot Locker, END clothing, the like. At around 4:30 in the afternoon, NozoEli finally showed up, and it looked like they were panting.

"About time you fuckers came in," said Nico sarcastically. Nozomi was dressed head to toe in items straight from Yeezy Season One purveyed by adidas. It wouldn't be surprising if her underwear was as well. Like Nozomi, Eli was clad in Yeezus' own make with feet clad in the coveted Air Yeezy 2 "Red October," complimenting Nozomi's own Yeezy Boost 750's; both "grails" for the whole group. Only once was all of Muse kitted out in matching Yeezys, and that was for the bi-monthly cover of Complex magazine. This had really set of Muse as more than just a guilty pleasure for otaku, but a guilty pleasure for all.

'Ah, ah'm sorry girls," Nozomi says in her Kansai accent. "Eli was just taking a little too much time to cum. I guess her dick isn't as good as it used to be," she says, almost disappointed.

"What'd I tell you guys?!" Nico exclaimed. "I knew these two keep fucking too much. It's an addiction which calls for an intervention! But, that's not we're here for."

"Jeez Nozomi! That was kinda harsh," Eli says in her harasho voice. Oh yeah, Eli's got both daddy parts and mommy parts. Guess I forgot to put that in the description, whoops. I'd think that it would be obvious, though.

"Oi," Honoka pipes up, "Looks like you're _still_ not satisfied, Eli." Honoka points attention to the slight chub in Eli's pants.

"Damnit," Eli mutters. "Just deal with it, alright? You guys don't know what it's like to have a dick. Well, except for Maki of course." Fuck, I guess Maki has a dick too. Haha.

"Okay, _anyways_ , my mom was able to grab some tickets to the next Sneaker Con," says Kotori.

"You mean in fuckin' _America_ nya?" Rin says spastically.

"New York City, to be exact," Kotori explains. "Our plane tickets are scheduled for midnight tonight, so we better get our bags packed."

"Holy shit," Nico realizes, "Maybe, just maybe, I can finally get a pair of Doernbecher 5's!"

"I can get my Undefeated 4's!"

"Yeezy Boost 350's!"

"OVO 12's!"

"Alright, calm the _fuck_ down everyone," says Umi. "We just have to pack up and head out with some American cash, and it better be quick."

"Umi, we forgot to tell them about the Triple Black Yeezy 750's," Honoka brings up.

Insanity ensued.

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 **I swear, it just gets more fun writing these chapters. I hope that you enjoyed this one as well! -Phil**


	4. Chapter 4

**Alright, it's been quite a bit, but let's get this cracky shitstorm on a roll!**

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"Okay, Honoka, I'm glad we're here..."the twintailed tsundere began,

"... but how many moving boxes did you bring?" Hanayo finished.

In the baggage claim of JFK airport in New York, a group of nine(?) girls with technicolored hair stand near a few stacks of medium-sized cardboard boxes marked "fragile" full of, you guessed it, sneakers. The eighteen-hour flight from Tokyo had weakened the teenagers, especially Umi and Maki who had seemed to be more volatile than usual.

"Honoka, I understand that we came here for Sneaker Con, but you never mentioned _anything_ about selling! Besides, have you always had _this_ many fucking pairs of shoes?" Umi railed.

"Umi, please calm down, people are looking at us," Kotori acknowledged the stares of natives onto their touristic company.

"I agree with Umi," Maki said, twirling a strand of hair with her left hand, "I could see wanting to flip a few pairs, but all of this? What's with that? I don't understand."

"Maki, your tsundere is showing," said the cat-like girl, distracted from her conversation with Hanayo.

"Ehehe, I thought that it would be easier to meet others by selling. I even reserved a few booths and have some displays in mind," Honoka explains sheepishly. "I borrowed some pairs from you guys anyway."

"...What?" the others inquired.

"Haha, don't worry, I'm not selling them, I think," Honker replied. "... I think."

"Oh my god Honoka, sometimes I want to strangle you like a _fuckin-_ hold on, where are Eli and Nozomi?" Nico asked slowly.

Hanayo replies, saying, "They said something about bending over and seeing the fifty states."

"My god, someone is definitely bending over." Nico runs to the nearest women's restroom, making sure not to crease her Flu Game 12's or damage her biker denim.

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"Holy shit Elicchi, if you dare to stop fucking me, I'll bite your hot fucking dick off," Nozomi's high-pitched voice could be heard coming from a stall in the women's restroom, sounds emanating from the latrine. Nico could see a black Supreme tank top hanging from the door of the stall as she walked in, and two pairs of joggers down to the couple's ankles. A pair of KITH Tubular Dooms could be seen on its toes, squeaking behind a pair of Tianjin Foams. "Aah, Nozomi, yell at me more! More!" Eli moaned, her voice strained and out of breath.

"Um, _hello~_?" Nico said obnoxiously and caustically.

"Ah, Nicocchi, have you come to join us?" Nozomi said in between breaths. Eli could only stutter in confusion and embarrassment.

"You're fucking kidding me, aren't you? Fuckin' titty monster. C'mon, we have to pick up our rental car," Nico said, restraining her wrath. "Have you even noticed that you're in a _public fucking bathroom_ ,"

"Oh, don't worry Nicocchi, I know it's a fucking bathroom" Nozomi said with a snicker in her voice. "That's why Elicchi's assaulting me with her long Russian sausage ;)"

"Please, I have a girlfriend with a dick twenty centimeters longer than Eli's."

"Then Maki's must reach to the moon and back, Nicocchi."

"LET'S GO OKAY THANKS."

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"Eli, you've gotta get your girl on a leash," said Nico as the third years approached the others. Nozomi's and Eli's clothes seemed tattered, and were very obviously creased and wrinkled in multiple places.

"Other way around, Nicocchi," quipped Nozomi.

"Ignoring that, Eli, we need your help with these boxes," Nico said with a sigh.

"Rin and Kotori are carrying four boxes each! It's only fair, Eli," Rin exclaimed with medial amounts of genki.

The idol-group-turned-hypebeasts(read: idiots) marched out from the terminal and were met with their only transport, which was a box truck. It had a simple set-up, with two seats in the front and a closed container in the back, which proved hard to decide who would sit up front.

"Eli's obviously driving, but we have to decide who's sitting up front and quick; it's going to get dark soon and our hotel is quite a distance away," said Umi, noticing their newfound plight.

"Nozomi's definitely not being chosen because I'm sure she'll jerk her off and make us crash," Nico piped up. "... and Super Idol Nico Nii simply cannot ruin her appearance in the back of a _truck_."

"I'm too rich and pretty, so I can't sit in the back with the _cargo_."

"Rin's way too ecstatic for me to handle her; Honoka is as well."

"I might just bother you... so... *mumble mumble*"

"You shouldn't waste such important space on Kotori..."

"Umi will just worry about the boxes falling on her."

A slight quarrel had taken place, enchanced by the videos being taken by fans who recognized them. After multiple death threats thrown about by NicoMaki, passive-aggressive notes by KotoUmiPana, sheer ignorance by HonoRin, and sexual promises by NozoEli, the consensus was that Eli would be by herself in the truck's cabin.

The single-vehicle "convoy" had left the airport, en route to a certain hotel in the heart of New York City.

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As expected, the box truck's cargo bay was uncomfortable to ride in, with the only place to sit being on its floor.

"Maki," Nico spat, "what happened to you being rich as an Akiba hooker?"

"What, did you expect a limo? Stop being so stuck-up and unappreciative," Maki replied "You know, I've already decided that you're not gettin' none of DIS DIK tonight," she ended, sounding out of character.

KotoHonoRinPana laid together on the right side of the truck, acting as barriers to keep them in place. Nozomi for once wasn't grinding on Eli's "long Russian sausage ;)", and simply shared a game of cards with Umi and Eli, albeit very difficultly done.

"Is this really what I have to go through for _five fucking hours?_ " Nico complained, with the only reply being the squeaking of Nozomi on top of El- wait, what?

"Eli," Nico started, "shouldn't you be driving?" Nico hesistated to ask due to the nature of what Nozomi was doing to Eli.

"Um, well _uuuuuhh_ , Nozomi was bored and I was _urrgh_ bored. I was also tired, so after _uhhgh_ a nap, I came back here." Eli tried her best to annunciate her words, but failed and slurred whenever Nozomi put her thigh in between her legs. "Didn't you _ugh,_ notice that we weren't moving?"

"ELI PLEASE DRIVE NOW THANKS"

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 **I'm finally out of a slump! It may take a while for another chapter, though. By all means, please stand by! - Phil**


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